Sunday 11 October 2015

Mental Illness Awareness Week - What Colour Rope are You Carrying?







 I recently saw that this is Mental Illness Awareness Week.  Everyone has a vulnerability.  Everyone has a cause.  Access and Awareness for the treatment of Mental Illness motivates me.  I would like  to participate, but at this late date, I can only dream.

I am picturing my version of a Walk-a-Thon to support access and research for Mental Illness.  I am not sure in  what colour everyone has chosen to dress. There are men and women here.  Both bathrooms are being used equally.  Some of the group is very enthusiastic.  Some are not so excited. Everyone here is holding on to a rope and walking with their group. There are ropes of many colours.

There is a long rope held by the survivors, those of us that have been in the cuckoo's nest, afflicted
with mental illness.  This group has been blessed with the access to appropriate medical treatments and psychological strategies that allow us to no longer be marginalized.  These are the people you might not have expected to be here, up on the stage, telling their story because they just seem so "normal".  They are up there, trying to break the stigma. They are not comfortable as they know that they will be judged, but there they stand, owning their story. Some of us aren't ready yet but hope to be there one day.  We still have 1 foot in the closet.

There are the amazing people who support those who struggle with mental illness.  The nurses, doctors, many different healthcare professionals with varying backgrounds all trying to find the right mix of medication and  support that will address the very individual needs of each of their clients.  There are the educators who work with our children to assure their success.  These people have chosen to work in a field that does not appeal to many.  This group advocates and supports and they have made this walk possible.


We hope there are policy makers.  The longer the rope the better.  People who can use the funds raised today to improve access for all individuals.  The 'higher-ups" need to see all the
people here today.  They need to come to understand the prevalence and the large spectrum and overlaps of mental illnesses and the frustrating and unfair gaps in care. Maybe this walk will open a few of their eyes.


Families and friends are out in droves.  They are walking to raise money and awareness
for better access for their loved ones and more research.  Each walking for someone in their life or someone they have lost.

Parents of young children, who themselves may have struggled for years, are walking for their "problem" child.  Some of these kids are here too.  Some hold the rope very tightly.  The "hyper" ones run ahead.  The "slow" ones lag behind and there are those kids who just flat out refuse to hold the rope.  The parents are hoping this walk will help to make their child's world more aware and accepting and perhaps realize that an accurate diagnosis and treatment can make this child's life better than theirs has been.

There is a relatively new group to the walk  They are here because awareness is developing and young adults are showing up now with a stronger sense of comfort at this Walk.  Their parents and supporters are holding the rope with them, despite how overwhelmed they feel.  Many are deemed "helicopter parents" by those who don't understand that advocacy cannot always be done by the individual at risk.

Another large group is holding strong to their rope. It keeps them all together and makes them feel safe. These participants are those who strive every day with difficulty to maintain balance, seeking to manage their symptoms.  They know that mental health is not just the absence of disease. Some of them succeed at  times and then later may again struggle with their demons.  They understand there is no cure, just good management.  They are aware of their triggers and have developed strategies over a long difficult time.  They know the benefits of mental health days, exercise, proper diet and sometimes medication.  They try to remember in the dark times, that with the support of understanding friends and family, they can keep moving, 2 steps forward, 1 step back.  These are the people who really struggled to get to the Walk today.

Now, there are a lot of people who are not at the Walk today.   Many people wanted to be here holding on to a rope.   This is a group that no matter what their intention was yesterday, just couldn't get out of bed.  Some of these people may have finally gotten up, but were so overcome with the "what if's" of what the day might bring that they could not go.  Some couldn't get out the door.  They haven't been out in years.  Some didn't come because there were voices from the TV warning them to stay home.  Some were not physically well enough to come, their body weight, too high or too low, made it impossible to walk this far.  There were others who couldn't come today either, as they are a slave to their addictions.

There is another group that is absent today. They couldn't come to this Walk because they are hospitalized at this time. A team of healthcare providers is working very hard to stabilize them so they can participate next year.  Some are in the hospital willingly because they understand the risks associated with their disease.  They may have lost someone and seek the treatment that is not available to all.  There are those who do not choose to be admitted, but they are safe.  They are off the cliff.

Another bunch of people might have been somewhat unwelcome here today.  Their rope is all musty and doesn't smell very good.  Perhaps they aren't here because they have no shoes.  We all know them, but we may not have graciously welcomed them. It reminds many that each person, but for the support and access we take for granted, might have been us.

Today's Walk is just a snapshot. Many of us have held different ropes at different times.  We nod at each other to show understanding and support.  There are so many symptoms, diseases and over lap that I can't hope to include all the ropes. The diagnosis and treatment of mental illness is vast, complicated and ever changing.

I will however make note of a large, but perhaps shrinking rope lying on the ground, waiting to be picked up.  This group isn't on the Walk today.  They really saw no reason to come.  Some may be blessed to have family and friends who are emotionally healthy all the time.  I find this hard to believe though. It is unclear to some people just what the point was to this Walk.  They are not participating perhaps because they feel that everyone has problems and just need to deal with them.  Maybe all the walkers could just cheer up, stop worrying and realize that everyone has bad days.  They feel they could provide an insight into parenting the "problem" child with tough love.  They could try to give everyone a good shake. Is there really a problem.  If symptoms can't be measured, like

blood pressure, if a stethoscope can't hear it, if some doctors don't even see it, then wouldn't money be better spent on real illnesses with real symptoms.  Perhaps as this group becomes more enlightened, the stigma will continue to disappear.  Perhaps they will grab on to a rope one day when their heads emerge from the sand.

Well I see there are a lot of people on this Walk. It would certainly be an interesting group. These are the nicest people in the world.  There is ever a dull moment with us nut balls.   It would be long day of mixed emotions.  With any luck at all the sun would shine on this day.  A dark and rainy day for this Walk would just be cruel.












Friday 9 October 2015

Me Again!!



Well Hi:

Some of you know that I have conspicuously absent for a while.  Now I am back with a vengeance.  I started a blog post that ran into 2.  So this story is followed by a related gab session.  Take your time. 

Over the past few months, I have been embarrassingly lucky.  Our hospital raises funds by employee fundraising.  We have a 50/50  draw and I have won, TWICE.  People congratulate me, but I think they are rolling their eyes, understandably.  My windfall has been used for very frivolous purchases.  We now have a new washer/dryer and sadly that makes me happy.  Oh and it also paid to get my car out of the pound, when it was towed from a nearby parking lot.  So I guess I am not all that lucky all the time. 

This windfall has made me think more deeply about the role of fundraising.  Instead of just taking the money and running, I have felt I would like to give back a bit.  There are so many worthy causes.  It can be hard to decide where I would focus my efforts.  I have done a couple of Walk-a-thons.  It is a nice way to spend a day, walking with friends and breathing in the excitement.  The downside is that I must hit my friends and family for donations.  I have trouble selling a raffle ticket, but I am embracing this new passion.  "Me Again" It starts with the odd Facebook request.  Then the personal emails start.  "Oh God, here she goes.  She is at it again."  My supporters now actually pay me to get off my butt.  I find though that after a few walks, my coworkers try not to make eye contact and I am no longer invited to parties in case I show up with an agenda and a rope.

It seems weird to me that at this stage of my life, I have embraced fundraising.  There was a time, as many of you know or remember, that as a parent of a school-aged child, a great deal of effort was supposed to be spent raising money for many worthy causes.  The problem was that hitting up friends and family to sponsor my children was very uncomfortable, partly due to the frequency of events when one has 3 children.  I just accepted, after a while, that I could not compete with the families who seemed to raise tons of money through the sale of the item of the week.  They put us to shame.   My children often seemed disappointed in my lackadaisical attitude. I spent many hours of their childhood feeling badly about our lack of support, while I read Chatelaine and ate apples and boxes  of chocolate covered almonds. 

I remember vividly, Kate at about 6 years old, trying desperately to carry a huge boom box home,
after her fundraising dance-a- thon.  She was so excited to be the winner of such a great prize.  She didn't even listen to music yet, but she knew this was something special.  This was an early glimpse of the benefits of fundraising.

 My recent experience with fundraising was the CIBC Run for the Cure.  Some of you sponsored me and I thank you for your generosity.  I felt I was paid well to walk for 5 km.  My weekend included a dinner out with my girls and breakfast with my son after the walk.  Breakfast included a mimosa and the afternoon was just
one big nap.  I mean really,  I may appear altruistic, but really, I just loved the outing.

 The atmosphere at the run/walk was mind-blowing.  So many people.  So much pink.  Without judgment I note that the majority of participants were women, but there were a significant number of men dressed in rosy boas. However, I still plan to lobby for an open door policy on the men's washrooms.  There were young and old alike.  Many breast cancer survivors were gratefully participating. Everyone was walking for someone. There was excitement, joy and sadness all rolled up into a glorious Sunday morning with sun shining and just enough of a breeze so I didn't even break a sweat.  It was a great day.  What's next?  Where do I sign up?



At this point though, it may be time to hang up my Go Walk sneakers for a bit. I will take my turn and give support to friends and families and their worthy causes.  We all have vulnerabilities.  We all have our causes. We all hold some kind of rope.  Supporting each other in our particular struggles is what opens our eyes to the plight of others.  We get to walk a day in another's shoes.  I will continue to train for next year.  I need to keep in shape.  I may just pull out the old boom box and hold my own personal dance-a -thon in my kitchen while gorging on Girl Guide cookies.  Never let it be said I didn't do my part.



Bell Let's Talk is SCREAMING IN MY EAR.



I have a strong appreciation of the importance of supporting causes about which we feel passionate. We all have our vulnerabilities. We all have our "stuff".  Raising awareness of the prevalence of Mental  Illness and fighting the stigma associated with it, speaks to me. Actually today Bell Let's Talk is SCREAMING IN MY EAR. I thought I would repost my vision of Let's Walk and Talk.

 I am picturing my version of a Walk-a-Thon to support access and research for Mental Illness. There are men and women here. Some of the group is very enthusiastic.  Some are not so excited. Everyone here is holding on to a rope and walking with their group. There are ropes of many colours.

There is a long rope held by the survivors, those of us that have been in the cuckoo's nest, afflicted
with mental illness.  This group has been blessed with the access to appropriate medical treatments and psychological strategies that allow us to no longer be marginalized.  These are the people you might not have expected to be here, up on the stage, telling their story because they just seem so "normal".  They are up there, trying to break the stigma. They are not comfortable as they know that they will be judged, but there they stand, owning their story. Some of us aren't ready yet but hope to be there one day.  We still have 1 foot in the closet. 

There are the amazing people who support those who struggle with mental illness.  The nurses, doctors, many different healthcare professionals with varying backgrounds all trying to find the right mix of medication and  support that will address the very individual needs of each of their clients.  There are the educators who work with our children to assure their success.  These people have chosen to work in a field that does not appeal to many.  This group advocates and supports and they have made this walk possible.


We hope there are policy makers.  The longer the rope the better.  People who can use the funds raised today to improve access for all individuals.  The 'higher-ups" need to see all the
people here today.  They need to come to understand the prevalence and the large spectrum and overlaps of mental illnesses and the frustrating and unfair gaps in care. Maybe this walk will open a few of their eyes.


Families and friends are out in droves.  They are walking to raise money and awareness
for better access for their loved ones and more research.  Each walking for someone in their life or someone they have lost.

Parents of young children, who themselves may have struggled for years, are walking for their "problem" child.  Some of these kids are here too.  Some hold the rope very tightly.  The "hyper" ones run ahead.  The "slow" ones lag behind and there are those kids who just flat out refuse to hold the rope.  The parents are hoping this walk will help to make their child's world more aware and accepting and perhaps realize that an accurate diagnosis and treatment can make this child's life better than theirs has been.

There is a relatively new group to the walk  They are here because awareness is developing and young adults are showing up now with a stronger sense of comfort at this Walk.  Their parents and supporters are holding the rope with them, despite how overwhelmed they feel.  Many are deemed "helicopter parents" by those who don't understand that advocacy cannot always be done by the individual at risk.

Another large group is holding strong to their rope. It keeps them all together and makes them feel safe. These participants are those who strive every day with difficulty to maintain balance, seeking to manage their symptoms.  They know that mental health is not just the absence of disease. Some of them succeed at  times and then later may again struggle with their demons.  They understand there is no cure, just good management.  They are aware of their triggers and have developed strategies over a long difficult time.  They know the benefits of mental health days, exercise, proper diet and sometimes medication.  They try to remember in the dark times, that with the support of understanding friends and family, they can keep moving, 2 steps forward, 1 step back.  These are the people who really struggled to get to the Walk today.

Now, there are a lot of people who are not at the Walk today.   Many people wanted to be here holding on to a rope.   This is a group that no matter what their intention was yesterday, just couldn't get out of bed.  Some of these people may have finally gotten up, but were so overcome with the "what if's" of what the day might bring that they could not go.  Some couldn't get out the door.  They haven't been out in years.  Some didn't come because there were voices from the TV warning them to stay home.  Some were not physically well enough to come, their body weight, too high or too low, made it impossible to walk this far.  There were others who couldn't come today either, as they are a slave to their addictions. 

There is another group that is absent today. They couldn't come to this Walk because they are hospitalized at this time. A team of healthcare providers is working very hard to stabilize them so they can participate next year.  Some are in the hospital willingly because they understand the risks associated with their disease.  They may have lost someone and seek the treatment that is not available to all.  There are those who do not choose to be admitted, but they are safe.  They are off the cliff.

Another bunch of people might have been somewhat unwelcome here today.  Their rope is all musty and doesn't smell very good.  Perhaps they aren't here because they have no shoes.  We all know them, but we may not have graciously welcomed them. It reminds many that each person, but for the support and access we take for granted, might have been us.

Today's Walk is just a snapshot. Many of us have held different ropes at different times.  We nod at each other to show understanding and support.  There are so many symptoms, diseases and over lap that I can't hope to include all the ropes. The diagnosis and treatment of mental illness is vast, complicated and ever changing.

I will however make note of a large, but perhaps shrinking rope lying on the ground, waiting to be picked up.  This group isn't on the Walk today.  They really saw no reason to come.  Some may be blessed to have family and friends who are emotionally healthy all the time.  I find this hard to believe though. It is unclear to some people just what the point was to this Walk.  They are not participating perhaps because they feel that everyone has problems and just need to deal with them.  Maybe all the walkers could just cheer up, stop worrying so much, relax and think positively.  Some in this group might feel they could provide an insight into parenting the "problem" child with tough love.  They could try to give everyone a good shake. Is there really a problem.  If symptoms can't be measured.  If a blood pressure cuff can't read it,

 if a stethoscope can't hear it, if some doctors don't even see it, then wouldn't money be better spent on real illnesses with real symptoms.  Perhaps as this group becomes more enlightened, the stigma will continue to disappear.  Perhaps they will grab on to a rope one day when their heads emerge from the sand.

Well I see there are a lot of people on this Walk. It would certainly be an interesting group. These are the nicest people in the world.  There is ever a dull moment with us nut balls.   It would be long day of mixed emotions.  With any luck at all the sun would shine on this day.  Could it be a dark and rainy day for this Walk?  I can't believe Mother Nature could ever be so cruel.